I asked Him to send me the answer, send relief, send a rescuer, send anything, anyone except me. But He did send me. Unequipped, ill-prepared, fearful, doubtful, tearful me. One step, two step, out on this journey. And looking around I see what happens when He sends such a tiny little girl out on a great big adventure. He sent me out with a hand full of small. I'm coming back with arm fulls of big. He sent me out to strengthen me for what I would gather along the way. Sent me forward when I had no idea where I was going. He knew. He still knows. And what used to be an uphill battle when I was first sent is just a stepping stone. And when He says who shall I send? I lift up my head and say me Lord. Send me. And when it comes, because it always does, I have learned to say no fear, no. Thankful.
Stop.
Learning to trust that He will equip you when He calls you is such a hard lesson....or maybe it is just me.
ReplyDeleteI am learning to do it afraid. That what I think it should look like or be isn't necessarily what it will be. But that He calls me to it for a reason. The fear of it won't kill me :)
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