5 Minute Friday - Same

There were days that I wondered if it would always be like this. Always be the same. Always feel the same. Was I ever going to be ok again. Change came around continually. And it felt at times like nothing would ever be the same again. My life, my stability, my heart. This year brought such a sweeping change that I can hardly wrap my mind around it. And literally nothing in my life is the same. Fragments and pieces everywhere. And I remember on the heaviest day, the hardest one, I asked Him what in the world? All this for what? And the whisper in my heart asked me to let go. Let go of the same old tired things I had begun to cling to. Because He wanted to do a new thing. He'd been telling me that for a while. And the day that brought the heaviest destruction also brought the next open door. And I said yes. And as much change as it has brought, there is also a sameness. A familiar tug. A bubble of hope. And I can feel it in the air again. Literally it's a tangible thing. It's been 15 years since I could say that. I can sense the cold coming. I can feel that same beautiful excitement that used to make me look forward to these next few weeks. And what I thought was dead isn't. I'm not. This didn't kill me. It made me a stronger girl. So different. But still the same. Right back round to the core of who He made me to be. And it's beautiful. And familiar. And the same thing I left. All these fragments picked up and made new into something beautiful. I'm something beautiful. The same girl I have always been. I just had to get here. Thankful.