Friday, December 6, 2013
Advent Day 6 - Permission
Permission.....that word. It creates a swirl in my head. I'm a rule follower for the most part. I function best when lines and borders and certainties are present. But that's not what He's called me to. No...most times He is asking me to color outside the lines and that is painful. I'm the girl who traced the black lines of color sheets in heavy dark crayon before I ever began to work inside those lines. Do not cross this.....nothing outside these lines....tracing my path to make familiar the borders that must contain what I was about to create. And He breaks those borders down and asks me to just move. And most often that makes me feel paralyzed. By hurts, by fears, by expectations, by old wounds, by scars......And still He says....Just move. I so often worry that I'm going to get it wrong that I forget the One Who never does.....I worry about perfect when He's the only One Who is.
So I'm giving myself permission to do what He is calling me to do. Even if it's scary. Even if it's quiet. Even if I have to walk alone. I give myself permission to love and work outside the lines that others have mapped out for me. Because the bottom line is He has given me permission to be me. And trying to do this any other way is just not going to work. I know. I've tried. Thankful.