9 Ironically this same tongue can be both an instrument of blessing to our Lord and Father and a weapon that hurls curses upon others who are created in God’s own image. 10 One mouth streams forth both blessings and curses. My brothers and sisters, this is not how it should be. 11 Does a spring gush crystal clear freshwater and moments later spurt out bitter salt water? 12 My brothers and sisters, does a fig tree produce olives? Is there a grapevine capable of growing figs? Can salt water give way to freshwater?
Fail...That is a 4 letter word that causes me to shutter. I don't like to fail. If I do it, then I better do it right and let's just be done with this shall we? So let's just say the last year and a half of my life have literally been about failing....completely....and it left me in a state of completely and utter confusion. I let God down AGAIN. I failed myself, my kids, my family..AGAIN. But this journey has also taught me that when I fail in the flesh and then submit it to Him, to do a work in me and in others, is to succeed in Christ.
The biggest area of struggle for me was my speech. It still is. I think that's why God tells me to be quiet so much. I have learned that what we speak has so much impact. Words change everything. We speak life or death into ourselves and those around us. It's easy sometimes to fall into the trap of emotions, your words become things that show your fears, that reveal those spots still so raw and tender. So I'm learning to that God uses that, those times and situations, even for our good. It reveals areas we need to turn over to Him. Obviously Lord, I still have many hurts and fears, it is evident in my speech. So instead of feeling condemned, lets take the opportunity to hand it all over to Him and ask for guidance, healing and restoration. These times of learning bring us closer to Him and ultimately what He want for us.